In July of this year I was facing some health issues and felt a huge need to reconnect with myself on a very deep level. It wasn’t only a reconnection I craved, but the bringing together of different parts of myself that felt as if they had wandered of without leaving a trail of breadcrumbs to find their way back home again.
One morning the need became so intense that I picked up a hardbound sketchbook and began gluing in sketches that I had done over the last little while, sketches that reminded me of the good things in life, places I felt safe, days that were special… and the sense of utter relief that I felt once this was done was overwhelming.
From that day on, my sketchbook/journal (as it became known) has never left my side. I poured my heart into it, my concerns about my health, about my ability to teach again, or continue working, my fears about the future. I also sketched daily, sometimes more than once a day. Sketched, painted, collaged.
It calmed me. When things got scary I was able to look back and in an instant be transported back to the garden, the beach, the lovely vase of flowers, my lover’s smile…
In it I pasted artwork that spoke to me, poems, quotes… I'd go back long afterwards and add paint to my sketches... it didn't matter how good they were, or weren't, just that I did them. And through it all I wrote, and wrote, balm for the soul, courage for the heart.
Have courage.
Forge ahead into a blank sketchbook/journal.
Bear witness to your own life.
And know that, when you forget the bag of breadcrumbs, somewhere between your sketchbook/journal’s pages, you’ll always be able to find your way back home again...to your self.
